24 May 2005
stained
being entirely surrounded by a sphere of stained glass floating somewhere beyond the shadow of a planet with light pouring in continually since birth it was a shock when without warning someone switched off the sun
I have sufficient knowledge of solar mechanics to understand this must have been initiated thousands of years ago but it still felt like a deliberate injury undertaken, well, yesterday (I was in the light all my life but I did keep a clock and a calendar)
once my eyes adjusted to the comparative darkness, lit only by my own dim thoughts the interior of the sphere reflected a bronze filigree, the faint sheen remaining on some segments of glass the sort of patina you’d find on a brass plate that had been buried a long while
I’m not really into that Plato’s cave thing and I don’t want to stretch the metaphor too far but
it was depressing to suddenly lose the illusions that had saturated me since birth
fortunately I have the ability to communicate through various pieces of equipment left to me by my parents
before they grew cold
hence this message now beaming into your mind
though I guess you’ll be as much in the dark as I am and won’t necessarily want to concentrate on what I have to say
which is too bad because I have some information that should interest you
concerning persons with whom I believe recently you have been
intimate
including congress in bowers where you thought you were not observed
or had jammed the video surveillance
these persons you thought were downloading like one long swipe through a reading device that lasted for years
were just hot impressions and fragments of magnets each with its poles for instance
Susan and Mike and Linda and Xiao are you
writhing in simulated ecstasy (for everything is simulated) a foursome a twosome a one
in that moment between turning from the monitor
and rising from the chair
you inhaled grace
and lost your infinity
you were born
and I was no longer
necessary